I have cracked teeth and my brain is exploding. You would think this would be funnier.

So, I know I have not written a post in a while. Which probably makes none of you sad. But I haven't really been able to clear my head and write. Because. of. stuff.

Those of you who know me personally might know that I am associated with a company that has recently been the center of some controversy in the media. For the murderers who read my blog, I live in India and I work for Nike. I have been under a lot of mental duress. Dave asked me why I cared so much, and why I let it get to me. I have thought about that a lot, and I guess the reason is that I feel like I am being faced with a lot of close-mindedness and ignorance, and that, try as I may, I can't explain to everyone how it really is. I am seeing that from all sides. What I DON'T want to do is discuss the debate here. What I am going to do is talk about what I am feeling. Because I am feeling a lot.

1. Surprise. I am so surprised and still in a state of shock that this is even happening. These allegations are not brand new, but the massive media hype is. I feel like this broad debate has been raging for a while, and that the recent explosion is because people, on all sides, saw this as an opportunity to make their own point. I have been surprised at the hate I have witnessed. I know I keep saying this, but seriously, from ALL SIDES. If you think that there's only one side that is expressing hate, you need to reevaluate the evidence. I have also been surprised by the love. I have seen lots of people FAS (I can't keep typing out "from all sides" or this will take forever) expressing their opinions in ways that are clear, but also accepting. I think when people stop trying to control other peoples' opinions the world will be a better place.

2. Stress. I am so stressed about this. It is so draining on me to be under a constant barrage of criticism and/or praise. I keep checking all news outlets to read the latest, even though a part of me wants to hide under a rock until this is all over. I feel like I NEED to know everything, so I can prepare the proper response ahead of time. Because, frankly, if I don't prepare it before, I will probably be stunned speechless when the time comes. I am so stressed that a fractured a tooth. I CRACKED MY TOOTH, dudes. It's cool guys, I've had these teeth for a while. I could use some new ones anyway. I cracked it by grinding them in my sleep. Which means I need a crown. Does anyone know where I can fax the invoice for my crown? I need to send it to EVERYONE.

3. Resentful. I am resentful that those filled with hate are using this controversy to further their messages of hate (FAS, obviously). Even more than that, I am resentful that people are telling me what they believe I stand for, instead of asking me. Regardless of whether I agree with them or not, I really hate that no one has bothered to ask. Everyone assumes I am either on their side or against them. But guess what, everybody? You have no idea what's in my brain (unless you read my blog).

Basically, I just want everyone to be nice. If you are on board with being nice, we can be friends. If you're not, I won't push you off the boat, because that would not be nice of me.  I have a lot of friends who are living very different lives for a lot of different reasons that don't matter. But guess what does matter? We are all adult enough that we have realized that differences don't have to drive us apart. Differences are what keeps things interesting.