I am so lame. I am chronically ill. No matter how many times I say it or how many times I newly resolve to keep up a blog, inevitably it dwindles. Quite rapidly, actually. Today is the day I change that! Maybe...
Well, it has been approximately seventeen millions eons since the proposal. We are still very much in love. I would, however, like to have a chat with whoever came up with engagements. Yes, it was very fun to go shopping for my dress with my mom, my sister, and my best friend. Yes, it was fun (albeit wildly embarrassing) to have a bridal shower. Yes, it was also a good idea to have some time to organize the wedding, reception, luncheon, and honeymoon. These are all just small moments of the engagement though. The majority of the time I am grinding my teeth, glaring at happy married couples, and smooching. The smooching is fine. Seriously though, I just want to be married. I am so sick of waiting. I know many people outside of Utah stay engaged for a very long time. That is no bueno for me. It's not the physical aspect and limitations that make me want to be married. It's all the wonderful little things that I can't have now and that I can't wait for.
I want to come home every night to my sweet Dave so we can hold each other and either console or congratulate each other on the events of the day. I want to be a part of something more than myself and have a greater purpose than just my own survival. I want to fall asleep in his arms and see his face first thing in the morning (I do not, however, want him to breathe on me at any point during the night or in the morning. I'll have to take that hurdle as it comes). I want to get together with our married couple friends for game nights and dinners. We'll talk about our boring married things. I can't wait. I want to start saving for our first home. I want to be his mrs. I want to decorate our cheap little apartment. I want to be his wife. It's the marriage that I can't wait for, not the wedding.
