how to make poverty look sexy

Now let me tell you, if you think Dave and I are poor NOW (we are) this is NOTHING compared to the poverty we have survived before. The difference is mainly that now it's like "Oh, I have use my own hands to cook food because I can't afford the salary for Gordon Ramsay" and then it was like "Oh, I can't remember last time we had sauce on our noodles" type of poor. Okay, so the first one I exaggerated a lot. The second one, sadly, I am barely exaggerating.

Here is Dave laying on our newlywed  "bed" which was made up of a futon so uncomfortable we had to put an air mattress on top of it. 

That being said, being poor is awesome. Sort of. It's not awesome at the time, but boy does it teach you an awful lot and give you some frighteningly great stories.

Growing up, my family always had enough, but we were not rich (because my parents were squirreling away all their secret riches to buy houses and vacations the second all of us moved out. Seriously, Costa Rica AND Jamaica in a year?!--but I digress). A lot of the decisions my parents made made me into the person I am today. I am not sure if they made those decisions based on finances, or if they intentionally avoided some things in life. Decisions such as:

1. Not having cable. I remember specifically the day I figured out that we didn't have cable. I was probably 8 or 9, and I was watching some cool TV show at the Gardiner's house, but it was time for me to go home. I  asked Susan what channel we were watching, so I could finish the show at home. She told me channel 10. I went home and tried in vain to find channel 10. My mom had to explain to me that we didn't have that channel.

As a kid, I was a little jealous of the kids who could watch all the cool shows on the Disney channel. It was exciting when I got to see a show everyone was talking about. But was I suffering without cable? Absolutely not. I wanted it, but I also wanted to ride a million pink ponies to a land of ice cream treats. So clearly, my brain could not be trusted.

Dave and I have cable now. He grew up with it, and felt deprived when we couldn't afford it. Now I am regretting it. We both agreed that we deserved it because we work hard and need a way to unwind. Which was all lies. Of course I watch TV, but I feel like my life would be better, more creative, more healthy, more efficient, if we had chosen not to get cable. I am not gonna lie, it also freaks me out how absorbed Reese can become in Sesame Street (says the woman who can be on pinterest for hours and not realize a second has passed).

2. We NEVER ate out. On our birthday, we got to pick dinner, so one year I remember asking for a happy meal (a delicacy!) and macaroni and cheese for everyone else, because I thought McDonald's was too expensive for my parents to buy for everyone. Which is funny, because my parents never discussed their finances with us or in front of us. The first time I even got an inkling of how much money my dad brought in was when I was 16 or 17. But we always ate at home. And it was good for us. In this world or rampant obesity, I am proud to say that my family has resisted that. We are not a family of health nuts. My mother did not diet or count calories for us. We just ate at home, at the table. In turn, as adults, none of my sisters are overweight(except maybe me...but shut up! I'm working on it!), and not a single one of the my parents' grandchildren has a weight issue. Intentionally or unintentionally, my parents showed us what was important.

I recently watched  (and obsessed over) HBO's weight of a nation documentary series. Yes, I understand that statistics can be skewed, but I feel that no one can argue the main message, America is fat and getting fatter, and we will all die big fatties if we can't figure this out. One thing it spent some time discussing is childhood obesity among impoverished communities. It astounded me. Kids eating every meal off the dollar menu and looking like blimps because of it. The thing that really astounded me was that I feel I eat out SO MUCH MORE when Dave and I have a little heavier cash flow. Being poor forces me to go to the grocery store and plan out some meals, and eat at home. I just don't understand. I feel like these parents are not thinking this through, and don't understand what I like to think of as the Costco principle. I went to Costco a while ago with a couple who was newlywed and struggling, and they were shocked at Costco's prices. They were shocked when I spent $100 there. I tried to explain to them how it might be a big expense all at once, but if you are spending $10 on lunch and dinner (not even an expensive meal) it takes less than two weeks to spend as much as I did at Costco, on more food that will feed my family healthier and longer. I feel like people can't understand that concept. And that's why 'Mericuh is just a bunch of fatties arguing about the healthcare system that they need to treat their exploding fat-filled hearts.

This has turned into quite the lengthy post. And I am not even remotely done discussing the greatness that being poor will make you. Patience, my friends. Patience. We'll get there.